Tuesday, 6 July 2010

The Eternal Bond Of Matrimony

Some say, marriages are made in heaven and lived on earth while others call it the ultimate form of commitment. The ideal definition of matrimony goes like this: A binding of two soul mates where they live, love, respect, share and cherish everything under the sun. It all sounds so sweet and perfect that it borders on unrealism and fantasy. The real deal is completely different. It’s not right or wrong but a different facet altogether. The most important component of it all is ‘Love’.

In the western countries, people marry more than once in their lifetimes. Every individual has a different reason for getting out of it. The fact of the matter is, no two marriages can be compared. As a result the divorce rates increase and may be sometimes eventually it becomes a habit.

As Helen Hunt quoted in the movie ‘The Good Woman’, (I may not get it word to word, the gist of what I remember):
"Marriage is like living in a room with a person you have fallen in love with. In some cases, as days and weeks pass, the room grows smaller and smaller. But at first, you don’t realize it. It happens in inches. And by the time you come to know of it, it’s too late to do anything. Then you feel stuffed and suffocated and there does not even exist a window and the doors are locked. So the only option that remains is unlock the door and get out."

The same scenario is quite different in the Indian Scenario. Here, love marriages are sparse but in the modern world, many people have accepted as the reigning one. So either the love happens first and marriage follows or marriage happens first and then love follows. In the latter case, it is said that love grows slowly and gradually and hence becomes everlasting. But what happens, when the love fails to grow? What happens to a loveless marriage?

We Indians are more governed and controlled by the society we live in rather than our emotions and decisions. Most of the times, the loveless marriages still carry on as being perfect for the benefit of the eyes of the society, but the moment the society is not watching, the scenario drastically changes. Though the divorce rates have increased considerably in Indian when compared to the earlier years, but still it is considered a taboo to get separated. I am in no way implying that we should follow the western culture and ruin the wonderful families we have. The reason behind being in a marriage should be the love people share and not the sense of duty towards the family, the relatives and the children. A delicacy loses its charm the moment the key ingredient goes missing.

The question is, in the world where everything changes right from people to places, is the bond of matrimony really eternal?